What Comes Next

After my epic weekend, and the resulting post, it is challenging to think of a “follow up.” The standards have been set high, given that people were excited to hear about our engagement adventure and were overwhelmingly supportive and congratulatory. I feel like anything I write now will be a let-down. However, I have a million thoughts bouncing around in my head as I come down from my recent emotional high, so I think I will use this as a bit of a dumping ground, and then go from there!

Foremost on my mind is the inevitable talk of weddings. It has genuinely surprised me that as early as two days from becoming engaged, people were asking if we’d set a date. Seriously? Do people really make a decision like that so quickly? I am still just getting accustomed to the idea and allowing my face muscles to recover from all the endless smiling. When someone mentions the actual wedding, my joy comes crashing down in a heap of confusion and paralyzing fear. Big, threatening dollar signs dance in my subconscious as though prepared to pounce on unsuspecting prey.  I have NEVER fantasized about a fairy tale wedding. I would have no idea how to even get started. My friend and student, Jen, was awesome enough to loan me a book about wedding planning.  I got about two chapters in before I decided it was all above my head. I have only actually been to a couple in my life, and the whole ordeal seems overwhelming and somewhat exaggerated. I am ALL FOR a big party involving food, gifts, friends, and family, but all the details are more than I want to tackle. Etiquette is something I tend to find outdated and comical, and when someone tells me “it is not proper etiquette to do____” , I immediately have the urge to do ”____.” I am really not good at following tradition, and things that involve rules with no common sense behind them infuriate me.

Buster and I are in agreement that the outrageous amount of money people spend on weddings is far out of our range. While we are getting on the right track now, finally, in our thirties, our lives up until the recent years have been rocky. We both have debt to pay off, and Buster will very soon have large school loans to pay back. We both have car loans, and we really want to save for a house so that we don’t have to spend the next decade in an apartment or rental home. I am tackling my debt with the raw aggression of a starving tiger, but it’s going to take close to two years to pay off the bulk, and another year or two after that to pay off my car. I have no idea how many years Buster will be paying for school but I am thinking it may be many. Many, many. Then we actually have to save for a down payment on the house which may take another year or two, and by then, somewhere near five years has gone by. Throw in a wedding that costs Americans an average of $15,000 to $25,000 and we’re talking something’s gotta give.

Wedding vs. debt payoff/house ownership? One day of fun and excitement (and stress and neurosis) or a major investment that will include a yard to play with dogs in which will improve my daily quality of life? Sorry, but the house wins hands down.

Now, that’s not to say I don’t want to be married. I am looking forward to becoming Mrs. Bonnie Leigh Pruett. I am also looking forward to a honeymoon (or any vacation that lasts longer than two days really) It’s just that unless we win the lottery, or get hitched downtown and forgo the rest, I don’t see how it’s going to happen anytime in the next five years. This could change with unforeseen circumstances, but when someone asks about a date, I am going to say “I’ll get back to you on that….”

Back to our regularly scheduled obsession, I am looking forward to hopefully going to class tonight with the Xan-Man, if it’s not raining, and then planning to go to some fun runs in Deland, FL on Saturday morning. At our last trial, I got the consistent contact performance I was looking for, but now want it faster!(and with less handler influence). We will be going to the same facility where we participated in our first night of USDAA last September, so it should feel like a trial, but with the added benefit of being able to take more risks for speed, to stop and correct mistakes, and to reinforce fast and independent performances! I am also fighting the urge to go on a spending orgy at Clean Run and buy a bunch of books and videos I haven’t consumed yet. I have to admit, agility=also more fun than weddings. I am just a miserable failure when it comes to being “girly.” I do agility.

Note: (In response to some suggestions, I would NOT want my dogs in a wedding ceremony. It’s a cute idea in theory, but I can picture the barking, jumping, food stealing chaos that would ensue. I love my dogs, but they don’t belong in any civilized function. They do agility…)